Boundaries, Breakdowns & Self-Worth: A Necessary Reset

This week’s blog once gain feels very personal and if I’m honest with myself, deeply necessary.

On Monday evening I held a small, intimate Reiki group to consciously step out of the Year of the Snake and into the energy of the Fire Horse. The intention was simple but powerful - to gently release and shed what is no longer serving us and to step into this new transformational chapter with clarity and positivity, as the new cycle began the next day on 17th February.

The space was held beautifully. An array of carefully selected crystals enveloped us in a grounded, soothing, healing frequency. We opened our hearts with a cacao ceremony, journeyed through a guided visualisation, moved into tapping and intentional journaling, and closed with some Reiki healing.

These evenings are such a honour to hold, to witness people showing up vulnerably and committing time to themselves. There is no judgement, no masks - just pure love, honesty and healing. I facilitate and hold the sacred space, but each individual person activates their own healing within it.

What nobody saw behind the scenes was the flooding disaster in my summerhouse that morning!  There were tears, panic and a moment where I questioned whether I should cancel altogether. But then I stopped, took a few deep breaths -  a reset, back in the moment and made the decision to go ahead anyway.

I moved everything into my living room and carried on.

And you know what? It was such a beautiful session. Nobody cared that it wasn’t the “usual” space. In fact, if I am honest it felt even more intimate and more real.

It reminded me that even when things don’t go to plan, it is okay to be human. I don’t have to be perfect or have everything polished - I simply just have to show up. But the deeper lesson didn’t stop there… 

Over the past few weeks, the energy has consistently circled around healthy boundaries, self-acceptance and healing. And as we stepped into this new Fire Horse energy - bold, courageous and forward-moving, I found myself facing something uncomfortable – my own self-worth.

I’ve always been a chronic people pleaser both in my corporate life and my personal life. Always worrying what people think and afraid of not being good enough or being judged.

When I navigated burnout, a heart attack and then Long Covid, I had no choice but to look at those patterns. It became clear they stemmed from childhood – ‘little Donna’ trying to do everything perfectly so she would be liked. Staying quiet, staying small and helping everyone else in the hope they would need me and accept me.

But I know now, what I truly needed was to accept myself - unconditionally.

To stop searching outward for validation and begin listening inward - to my body, my higher self, my soul. My soul knew I needed to reset and step back onto the path I was always destined to follow: healing, service and supporting others.

Yet healing is never linear – we are all on a continuous healing journey.

Recently, I realised I had been giving a lot away for free and whilst I genuinely love supporting people, I could feel my boundaries being tested. I caught myself questioning whether I was allowed to be paid for my gifts. Whether my time, my energy and my lived experience were “enough” to charge for and do you know what - that was my wake-up call.

I had began doubting my pricing. My worth. The value of what I offer.🥺

Then I paused once again - where was this coming from?

Here I was encouraging others to honour their energy, to set healthy boundaries, to fill their own cup and I realised I needed to recommit to doing the same.

This was my reset moment.

Because boundaries are not just about saying no to others, they are not you being selfish - they are about saying yes to your own value, your own worth.

So I gently returned to the practices that ground me.

1. Daily gratitude journaling
Every evening I write down five things I am grateful for, no matter how small. This shifts me from scarcity to abundance and resets my mindset before sleep.

2. Self-Reiki each morning
Even ten minutes brings clarity, calm and a grounded presence before the day begins. This is essential for me as reiki is not just a healing modality, it is a way of living and I embrace this way of life every single day.

3. Deepening my connection with the Violet Flame
A transformational healing energy that brings us back into the present moment - into the “I Am” presence. I now incorporate this daily within my own meditation practice as well as within my healing sessions for others.

What I want you to know is this:

I am on this healing journey with you.

The affirmations, the crystals, the grounding techniques, the journaling, the Reiki - I don’t just talk about them, I live them and I rely on them when I feel stretched or uncertain.

As we move into this new cycle, this new beginning you might want to gently reflect:

Some intentional journal prompts that you can use as you step into this new energy:

💚Where am I overextending myself?

🤍What boundary feels uncomfortable - but necessary?

💚Where am I undervaluing myself?

🤍What would change if I truly believed I was worthy?

💚What am I ready to release as I step into this new chapter?

🤍What would self-respect look like in action?

Some daily affirmations that you can use as you step into this new energy - repeat as and when you feel you need them:

✨I release what no longer aligns with who I am becoming.

✨I honour my energy and protect it with love.

✨I welcome new beginnings with clarity and confidence.

✨I trust myself to make aligned decisions.

✨I step forward grounded, courageous and open to abundance.

✨My power is safe in my hands.

Some crystals that can support you as you step into this new energy, you can meditate with one nearby or hold in your left hand as you meditate, journal or just to give you comfort:

🤎Smoky Quartz - grounding and energetic protection.

💛Citrine - abundance and confidence.

🧡Carnelian - motivation and forward momentum.

🧡Sunstone - vitality and encouragement to step into your personal power.

If you are navigating burnout, chronic illness, stress or overwhelm and struggling to set healthy boundaries for yourself, please know you do not have to do it alone. I hold space for women exactly where they are - through Reiki healing, coaching and intimate group circles. Sometimes we simply need someone to steady us while we remember our own strength.

This reset reminded me of something important:

✔️You can be compassionate and still charge.
✔️You can be generous and still have boundaries.
✔️You can be spiritual and still honour your worth.

As we move forward into this Fire Horse energy, may you not only move bravely, but move knowing your value.

Love & light,

Donna Marie 💚