Balance isn't about being perfect… it's personal✨

💛Summer of Healing with Donna Marie

✨A gentle journey back to yourself✨

Summer Reflection | Week Four - Balance isn't about being perfect… it's personal

Have you ever noticed how we're constantly searching for balance, almost as though it's somewhere we'll eventually arrive? We tell ourselves that once work settles down, the kids are older, we've caught up with everything on the to-do list or life becomes a little less hectic, then we'll finally have time to breathe. The truth is, life rarely slows down on its own. There is always something else to do, somewhere else to be or another responsibility waiting around the corner for us. I think balance is something we have to create for ourselves and it is often in the smallest and simplest of moments.

Yesterday was a perfect example of this for me, I had tried to cram far too much into one day and, if I'm totally honest, I knew I was pushing it. I had planned an evening walk, but by the time I'd finished everything else I realised my body had already made the decision for me - the walk wasn't going to happen this time. A few years ago I would have been really frustrated with myself and probably carried on regardless (pushing myself), ignoring every signal my body was giving me. These days, I've learnt that sometimes changing the plan isn't giving up, it's listening and knowing what I need in the moment.

What made the day special wasn't ticking everything off my list (it is a never ending list anyway!). It was a visit to the lavender fields in Sandygate for one of their tours (@manxlavender.com). In the middle of the countryside I was surrounded by rows and rows of beautiful purple flowers, there were so many bees happily moving from one plant to another, whilst the most incredible scent filled the air. After I had tried some yummy homemade lavender lemonade and shortbread biscuits I got to watch the lavender being harvested before seeing how the essential oil is extracted in the still, and I honestly couldn't believe how much care, patience and hard work goes into producing something so simple and calming as an essential oil. I came away thinking how much we all rush through life, rarely appreciating the process behind the things that bring us peace.

That hour and a half did more for my wellbeing than any other task on my list ever could. I wasn't thinking about work, hospital appointments or everything I needed to do next. I wasn't worrying about tomorrow. For that short time I was completely present, and I came home feeling so much lighter, not because anything in my life had changed, but because my energy had.

Looking back now, I realise I have spent so many years living completely out of balance. When I worked in the corporate world I was a self-confessed workaholic. My diary was always full, I was constantly achieving, constantly busy and always chasing the next deadline. At the time I really thought that was success. I wore my busyness like a badge of honour (as so many of us do!). It never even crossed my mind that whilst I was feeding my career, I was slowly starving every other part of myself.

I think so many of us live predominantly in what is often described as our masculine energy. This isn't about men or women; we all have both masculine and feminine energy within us. Masculine energy is the part that helps us plan, organise, achieve and take action. It's incredibly important because without it we'd never get anything done. Feminine energy is different. It's the quieter side of us that encourages creativity, intuition, rest, playfulness and connection. It's the part that reminds us to wander through lavender fields, dance in the garden, listen to music that makes us smile, paint, read, laugh with friends or simply sit with a cup of tea and watch the world go by.

Neither is better than the other because we need both in life (like yin and yang). The problem comes when one completely outweighs the other and there is no balance.

Living with a chronic condition has forced me to learn this lesson in a way I probably never would have otherwise. There are days when my body simply says "no", whether I like it or not. I can try and push through for a while, but eventually it will stop me in my tracks. As frustrating as that has been over the years, it has also become one of my greatest teachers. I've learnt that balance isn't about squeezing everything in; it's about making sure I include the things that nourish me as well as completing the things I have to do.

That's why you'll often find me outside with bare feet on the grass, practising self-Reiki, holding a crystal in my hand, wandering through the fields, having a sea dip, hugging a tree, reading a good book or dancing around the garden to my favourite music. Dancing is still one of my favourite ways to shift my energy. It might sound a little unconventional to some people, but our bodies aren't designed to keep emotions locked away. They need movement and expression. Sometimes I'll dance until I laugh, other times I'll dance until I cry. Sometimes I've even been known to scream and shout into a cushion (or pillow!) when life has all felt a little too much! It sounds ridiculous, but I promise it feels so much better than carrying all of those emotions around inside of you. Energy needs somewhere to go, and our bodies are incredibly good at letting us know when we've been holding onto things for too long.

I've come to believe that protecting our energy isn't another thing we have to add to our to-do list, it is something we can weave into our everyday life.

✨It's choosing to spend ten minutes outside instead of scrolling on our phones

✨It's saying no without guilt (those boundaries matter!)

✨It's making time for the people who leave us feeling lighter instead of drained (you know who they are!)

✨It's remembering that joy isn't something we earn once we've finished everything else; it's something we need if we're going to keep showing up as the best version of ourselves

So as we continue our 💛Summer of Healing together, I'd love you to ask yourself one simple question.

➡️What would bring a little more balance into my life this week?

I'm not talking about next month or when life finally calms down. I'm talking about this week. What do you need to bring a little more balance into your life right now? It doesn't have to be something big. In fact, the smallest moments are often the ones that stay with us the longest.

Maybe balance for you begins with a walk. Maybe it's a cup of tea in the sunshine. Maybe it's putting your favourite song on and dancing around your kitchen like nobody's watching. It is very much personal and different for each and every one of us and that is ok 💚

Whatever it is, don't wait until you feel you have earned it – I promise your soul has been asking for it all along and it very much deserves it today (and every other day).

Love and light,

Donna Marie 💚✨